Monday, January 10, 2011

Baby Journey-week 6

Symptoms:  Nothing new really.  I have been sleeping through the night again, but I thought I might upchuck in the shower the other day.  I didn't though :)  I haven't been so sleepy in the afternoons.  Weird, huh?  I had heartburn a couple of nights last week.  My appetite has decreased if anything.  Sometimes I just don't feel like eating.  My pregnancy nose is still going strong. 

Emotions:  Definitely emotional!  I cry or "tear up" over anything remotely sad.  I cried over that political shooting in Arizona, I cried over a blog post I read about the number of abortions in New York, I cry when looking at pictures of nurseries, I cry when I think about Hubby not being with me for the birth, and I cry when I get homesick.  I haven't been grumpy anymore so that's really good.  Some days I am pretty stressed, some days I am fine, but that's not really because I'm pregnant...that's because my life is in a very transitional period right now (thank you army). 

Doctor's Appointments, etc.:  Well, I went & peed in a cup for the army...turns out I'm pregnant! :)  Then, on Friday I had to drive Hubby to work (with Baby Girl of course) so I could keep the car & then I had mess up Baby Girl's naps to drive back to post for an "appointment" which turned out to be "pick up this pack of paper".  It took about 3 mins.  Thank you army!  On Wednesday I asked my friend to watch Baby Girl so I can go to a class called "Having a baby in Germany" or something like that even though I will be having my baby in America.  THEN, finally after 3 trips to post, I will get to actually go to my first doctor's appointment...on my birthday!  Sheesh-everything is so much more complicated across the pond!

The Baby: Dun-du-du-dun....we have a lentil!!

Friday, January 07, 2011

I'll tell you a secret

I love being a mommy.  (No, that isn't my secret, everyone who knows me knows that!).  It is so very rewarding and fun (and tiring!).  I love making my own babyfood.  I love reading to my daughter.  I love nursing her & making her giggle.  My days are well spent.  I am also learning to love being a housewife.  I am not there yet, but I like it more now than I used to.  I mostly enjoy cooking dinner every night & I enjoy the feeling when my kitchen is cleaned up for the night & everything is in it's place.  All that to say that I am pretty happy where I am right now.  I am content with my main goal in life for the next several years to be a good mommy/housewife. comes my secret.

I want to be a librarian one day.  Like, I fantasize about it.  I want to catalog books and help college students find the resource they need.  I want to be in charge of things and/or people and have responsiblities. I want to have co-workers again.  Oh man, how I miss having co-workers!  I want to be known for myself & not through my husband or my children.  One of my bigger fears as far as the realm of "it's not the end of the world" fears go is that I will never go back to school & I will never be a librarian.  First of all, the degree is like $50,000 (I think).  Second of all, I was never the best student.  Third of all, I am really not self-disciplined enough to do online courses so we would have to live somewhere where that degree is offered and that isn't everywhere. 
BUT...God could work out the details.  Better in His hands than mine.

So, there you go.  My dirty little secret :)

Tuesday, January 04, 2011

My Baby Journey

I was inspired by Kathryn over at Singing Through the Rain to document my baby journey and I am really excited about it!  My intention is to update weekly, but we'll see how that goes... :)

The Plan:  Back in October me & Hubby found out his deployment was being moved up 4 months earlier than we had first been told.  We were originally going to start trying when Baby Girl turned one.  (I write that with a knowing grin because I had baby fever since Baby Girl was about 3 months old and definitely wanted to try sooner but due to "logical" reasons, we were going to wait).  Well, when we found out about deployment we said we would start trying in January.  I had an IUD in at the time & wanted it out so my body could have some time to adjust before we started trying.  The problem was that my doctor was 1800 miles away.  So we tried to find a local one to no avail.  We had to get permission from the army & then find a doctor that took Tricare & had an open slot.  We had basically given up & were going to wait until we got to Germany.  Well, I saw the number of one of the doctor's I had called that had been closed when I called.  I called the number & yes, they took Tricare & yes, they had an open slot for the one day that we were able to go!  Then we got to Germany & I am telling you, my baby fever would not go away.  So one night me & Hubby prayed about it & we really gave it to God.  For my part, it was hard because I thought I wanted a baby no matter what God said.  I finally was able to give it to God & told Him that if He wanted us to wait, then I would be obedient.  Well, both me & Hubby felt like God was giving us the green light to start trying so we did.

Finding Out:  We were going to wait until Christmas morning to take the test, but we couldn't!  We bought one of those early pregnancy tests & we saw a faint pink line.  I was estatic and nervous.  Estatic because I knew it meant I was probably pregnant, but nervous because it was so faint.  We could see it, but barely.  I was still physically shaking with joy though.  I made Hubby feel my heart & it was pounding out of control!  We went ahead & told Baby Girl who didn't respond much :)  Then we re-took it on Christmas morning & it was dark pink!  We were SO VERY VERY VERY VERY happy!!  We told our parents that evening via Skype. 

Symptoms: So far, sleepiness in the late afternoon (but nothing like with Baby Girl-maybe because I'm not working?), waking up once a night to "make water", sweet things turn my stomach, when I get hungry I turn into a grouch (that's a new one), and my pregnancy nose is back! I can smell you fom a mile away! :)

Emotions:  I am first of all, so very thankful to God for granting me the priviledge of being pregnant again.  It is an honor to house one of His amazing creations.  I am overwhelmed by His goodness when I think about being pregnant.  This pregnancy is so different for me than my first.  With Baby Girl, I did not enjoy being pregnant.  I actually freaked out shortly after we got pregnant & did not come to peace with my pregnancy until the very end.  I did not realize that a miracle was happening inside of me.  I feel like I "wasted" it by being selfish & immature & just plain clueless.  This time I am going to cherish every second & never take for granted a healthy baby.  After thankful, the next emotion I feel is EXCITED!  Anytime I need a pick me up I just look at my preggo stick (the home kit) & I can't help by smile & giggle!   

The baby: Last week, it was the size of a poppy seed

This week it is the size of a sesame seed! 

I love my little baby sesame seed!!

*I got those photos from  It is an awesome website if you have kiddos!

Monday, January 03, 2011

Thank you God for the slap in the face

Seriously, after I wrote my last post & published it I went HERE.
God is so very good at humbling us & keeping things in perspective.  I am so thankful He keeps me on track.  I would be such a train wreck without Him.

So, it's been awhile..

Yeah, sorry 'bout that.  Life has been-yep, you guessed it-crazy.  I mean, how do these army wives do it?  All this transition all of the time.  It's HARD!  Me no likey. 

Now we are in our apartment & I know we will love it if we ever get unpacked.  The problem is our personalities do not lend to getting things done in a timely manner.  I wish my mom or my mother-in-law could come over & help me.  I just need someone to help me, to keep me focused on the task at hand, and to watch Baby Girl.  I want pictures on the walls and boxes gone!  I feel like as soon as we get settled, we will move again.  It is very hard to motivate me normally, but even harder when I know that all this work is only for 5 months.  But I want to have a nice home.  If I wait until we are "settled" I will be waiting years! 

I am SO VERY envious of people who have babies in the same home where they raise them.  I am SO VERY envious of people who can decorate their baby's nursery before their baby is born.  I moved 2 weeks after Baby Girl was born.  This time I am moving 8 weeks before the baby's due date.  Of course I know that pretty nurseries don't really matter, but I am envious nonetheless.  And I am so very thankful we are pregnant again.  So very thankful.  I cannot imagine the heartbreak people go through who have problems getting pregnant.  To sum things up=I AM blessed, but I FEEL sorry for myself.  Yeah, that's about right.

Christmas was alright.  Not the wonderful 1st Christmas I wish Baby Girl could have had, but given the situation, it could have been a lot worse.  The sesame seed inside of me isn't going to have a great 1st Christmas either since his/her daddy will be deployed.  We had lots of gifts to open & our tree was beautiful.  I guess it just didn't feel very special without family.  I am holding out for Christmas 2012 when my famil of 4 will be together & maybe even some family from the states could join us over here-that would be AWESOME!  On a side  note, I love love love saying we are a family of 4!  I have 2 babies, 2 children...blessed am I :)

Ok, as far as general life goes everything is harder.  Between the Germans & the army we have to jump through 20,000 hoops to get anything done-like driving our car or getting Internet or plugging in a friggin' lamp.  In some of our bedrooms our electricity is set up only to work if the overhead light is on.  What??  Yes, so none of the outlets work unless the overhead light is on.  Forget about alarm clocks or night lights or noise machines.  We even tried turning on the overhead & unscrewing the lightbulb, but the lightbulb has to be making an actual electric connection so that didn't work.  We called our landlord about it 2 weeks ago & nothing.  Our car needs new a remewed registration for post & in order to give us a new registration they have to keep our plates for 24 hours so no car for 24 hours.  Make sense?  Not to me, but it must to the army.  I can't go see a German OB until the Americans give me a blood test proving I'm pregnant so I get to take Baby Girl to two appointments instead of one.   If you wait in line for a hour and half for an inspection or a carwash or anything really, the workers can say "sorry-it's our lunch break" come back in an hour and wait again.  Customer service seems non-existant.  SO, if you thought living in Germany was a fun-filled fabulous life, think again!  haha, I think it will get better.  Everyone says this is a great duty station.  Evidence of it is bound to turn up to support that statement sooner or later.

Travel?  Well, maybe if my husband was ever home!  I see more of my daughter who sleeps 16 hours a day than him.  Deep breath & "Serenity Now" :):) Any Seinfield fans out there?

Ahhhhh, doesn't it feel good to get things off your chest?  I try not to be a complainer, but some days I give in.  Today was one of those!