That, right there, is my favorite color I'm pretty sure. I have tons of clothes that color and that was the color of my bridesmaids dresses. I think it is called wine or something.
Ok, my secret for this week is: I wish I could have natural childbirth. I'll tell you right now I won't. But I wish I was strong enough to try. I'm not. Honestly, there is no debate here. When (I am saying when, not if because I have hope) I get pregnant again I will be getting an epidural in a hospital with a MD. But I do love the thought of a water birth with my husband. It just seems so romantic and more life changing somehow. My husband would NOT got for a water birth!! I am laughing just thinking about asking him. And I respect him enough that I wouldn't make him. He would meet me in the middle-like going natural, but in a hospital. He is very overprotective of me and out daughter already! And I love him for it :)
Anyway, I am a wuss. If my cousin sees this, I am in big trouble because she will try to convert me and I really don't think I can do it! I don't know why, but I don't even want to consider it because then I'm afraid I'll decide to do it and I just don't want to feel that much pain. What I ultimately wish is that I had a gigantic threshold for pain like my mom. But, like I said, I am a wuss. A big wuss. There's my secret, but don't tell my cousin!! :):):)
1 comment:
OK I'm going to have to go ahead and share a secret as well: I just do not see the point in a natural childbirth. There. I said it! I have zero desire. And, after having the little fairy with a failed epidural, I feel secure in my original decision to go with an epi for both of my deliveries! The pain was mind-blowing. Excruciating. It was not enjoyable. I did not even want to participate and was thinking that I should just refuse and ask for a C-section. Not to mention I kept freaking out because I felt like I physically could not do it and I started to get worry about the baby getting stuck half way down the birth canal and suffocating.
I screamed. Yes. It's true. The pain was such that it flew out of my mouth and there was nothing I could do about it. The ring of fire you hear about? Yes ma'am. I felt like I sat on a burning ring of fire. I went down down down and the flames rose higher.
With Abby it actually was enjoyable. I posed for pictures in between pushing and I really didn't feel anything but 'pressure.' Now that's an enjoyable experience to me. Not screaming. No fire.
Epi epi epi :)
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