I've quickly learned as a mom of 3 how the world is not built for "big" families. Having three is so different than having two.
First of all, there is just a general impression you get that people don't understand why you would have three. And, with us, why on earth we would have 3 so close together. I mean, according to society, two is accepted and even expected, but any more than that..."they" want to know "why"? I find myself explaining "we didn't plan this"...like having 3 under 3 is some sin that I should have known not to commit. I hate it and I have just decided to never again say that to people. Planned or not, it is one of the most beautiful things about my life and I don't need to explain it away to anyone.
There is also the issue of childcare. I've started going to an exercise class (first time ever!) and I love it. I love working out and I love getting healthy. However, there is a childcare issue (unrelated to me) and there seems to be (possibly) too many children to have to baby sit. So, of course, I think I should just quit going. No one has said that to me, but I am the only one who brings 3 children and certainly the only one who brings 3 very young children.
I would like to join a bible study, but am afraid I will run up against the same issue. I take up one adult spot and 3 child spots. It is my right to attend these things...but I can't help but feel like they see me coming and inwardly groan. I am sure part of the problem is my own low self esteem and insecurities.
I wish society would see my children and smile. I wish people would see me pushing a double stroller with a baby strapped to my chest and say "how happy you must be" or "you are one lucky woman" instead of "whoa" or "I guess you are done having kids for awhile, eh?". I wish society loved children instead of seeing them as a financial burden or as stress.
My children are so special to me and so loved by me (and my husband!) and it pains my heart to have people think they are anything less than wonderful. For us, it is can be very challenging having all these littles, but also so very worth it.
I don't know how to feel comfortable/accepted in society with these kids, but I better figure it out because we may have more!
Monday, May 13, 2013
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Ladybug Two Months
How is the gorgeous child two months old? I still think my heart might burst from loving her so much.
She still rarely cries.
If I drink milk, her belly gets upset. (Same as the other two)
She smiles!
She coos.
All 4 of us are completely obsessed, especially Autumn. And me. And Chris. And Caleb.
Now, details to be later recorded in her baby book (I have barely begun Caleb's! I'm SOOO behind!)
Sleeping
She isn't on a strict schedule and every day it is a bit different, but she roughly naps 4-5 times a day and her awake time each round is about one hour. When we are not at home, she sleeps less and does OK with it. She is super flexible! At night she wakes up once or twice to eat. Here is the insane thing about that. I don't wish for her to sleep through the night. I mean, sure, it will be nice to get sleep, but I am LOVING her as a baby. Not struggling with postpartum depression this round has been freaking AMAZING (another post about that sometime!). I just want her to stay little for as long as possible. My 3 year on the other hand drives me to red fury waking up all the time...she woke up more times than Eliza last night.
Eating
She nurses every 2-3 hours. She is going for longer stretches when we are at home and gets really great naps in, but on the days we are out and about I tend to nurse her more often (less sleep, extra fussiness, more comfort needed? Not sure, but she eats more often when we aren't at home).
Playing
Hmmmm...not so much. She does smile a lot now when someone makes eye contact with her. The other night Chris was holding her and I came over to say hi and as soon as she heard my voice, she perked up! It made my entire month!!
She brings so much to our family and I absolutely could not imagine life without this beautiful girl!
Sunday, April 07, 2013
Ladybug One Month
My littlest little is one month old.
She is the most precious baby ever. Except for my other two of course.
I just love her so much my heart might burst.
She rarely cries which is quite a change from the other two! Autumn had colic and Caleb still cries all the time at 16 months.
She is a little peanut. Still in newborn clothes which is also a change from my other two. Autumn is a giantess and Caleb's nickname is Baby Hulk.
She eats good and sleeps pretty well. She sleeps better during the day than at night...why is that? I'm not complaining though...she has been really easy so far.
If I were to guess, I would say she is an "Angel Baby" according to the Baby Whisperer personality types (Angel, Textbook, Grumpy, Spirited, Touchy). Autumn is textbook and Caleb is touchy.
She is so pretty and easy going. Both of the big kids love her (thank goodness!) and enjoy kissing her and holding her. She takes it all in stride :)
I feel so very very blessed to be this precious child's mama.
Oh, and I call her my Ladybug...hence the title of this post ;)
Saturday, March 30, 2013
A Reading Recap: What I Read in the First Quarter
I *might* try to start blogging again. I've got so much to say...truly, I do! Life with 3 has been really great so far, but I'm sure that has something to do with my husband being off work and my mom living with us. That is about to end in 6 days. I am a bit nervous, but we will figure it out! For now, a book post.
I got this idea from Everyday Reading!
This quarter I have only read 5 books. That is so sad!! It makes my heart hurt. I'm pretty sure that is the worst reading record I have had since Kindergarten. I got in a big funk in January and only read one book and then in February I finished 2 and shelved 1 because it was not working for me (so annoying!). I actually have read 2 in March which isn't so bad considering I have a newborn! So, here they listed by date read:
1. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain.
This book was pretty fascinating for me because my husband is the biggest introvert I know. Well, he might possibly be tied with my father. It was like looking into a little window into his soul. After reading a part of the book about babies, I'm expecting my son to be an introvert as well. I am one of those weird people who hover between being introverted and extroverted. I would say I'm maybe 60% introverted and 40% extroverted (maybe...it's hard to really know for sure). If you are an introvert or have a special someone in your life who is introverted, I would definitely recommend reading it!
2. Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp
I started reading this with a group on Facebook, but then it kind of fizzled out so I finished it by myself. I did get more out of it when the group was discussing it. It wasn't a bad book, per se, but I just didn't get much takeaway from it. My children are very young and I parent with more grace (I guess that's the word?!) than the author seems to advocate. I give my 2 year old more than one chance to obey me. I let her get away with more if she is tired or hungry or emotional. Overall, I liked the message of parenting the heart, but found implementing it with very young children a challenge.
3. Legend by Marie Lu
I had high hopes for this dystopian young adult novel. I'm still not sure why I didn't enjoy it more. I think the characters didn't make an impression and that is huge for me. If I don't love (or hate) the characters, then the book is always a disappointment. Many people love this novel, though, and it's the first in a trilogy so check it out if you like young adult. I won't be reading anymore of this series.
4. My Name Is Not Easy by Debby Dahl Edwardson
This book I loved. I can't adequately describe it myself, so here is an excerpt from The Book Smugglers review on Goodreads:
...carefully crafted novel that follows the story of a group of Iñupiaq, Native American and white children who are sent to a Catholic boarding school in Alaska in the 60s. Although some of the characters and events are inspired by the author’s husband’s childhood experiences, My Name is Not Easy is mostly a fictional account of a complex period in Alaska’s history. In the early 60s, Alaskan parents had to send their kids away to boarding schools where the children were introduced to and forced to practice new ways of life – eating completely different food than they are used to, learning a new belief system, forbidden to use their own language not to mention being torn apart from their family and everything they had ever known.
It is awesome. Go read it. Plus, it's short. Added bonus for you non-readers out there.
5. Clockwork Princess by Cassandra Clare.
I will always indulge in Cassie Clare's novels. They are fun to read and there is always wonderful tension between the male and female protagonists. I actually shed a few tears while reading this one. I totally blame being postpartum for that silliness.
I got this idea from Everyday Reading!
This quarter I have only read 5 books. That is so sad!! It makes my heart hurt. I'm pretty sure that is the worst reading record I have had since Kindergarten. I got in a big funk in January and only read one book and then in February I finished 2 and shelved 1 because it was not working for me (so annoying!). I actually have read 2 in March which isn't so bad considering I have a newborn! So, here they listed by date read:
1. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain.
This book was pretty fascinating for me because my husband is the biggest introvert I know. Well, he might possibly be tied with my father. It was like looking into a little window into his soul. After reading a part of the book about babies, I'm expecting my son to be an introvert as well. I am one of those weird people who hover between being introverted and extroverted. I would say I'm maybe 60% introverted and 40% extroverted (maybe...it's hard to really know for sure). If you are an introvert or have a special someone in your life who is introverted, I would definitely recommend reading it!
2. Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp
I started reading this with a group on Facebook, but then it kind of fizzled out so I finished it by myself. I did get more out of it when the group was discussing it. It wasn't a bad book, per se, but I just didn't get much takeaway from it. My children are very young and I parent with more grace (I guess that's the word?!) than the author seems to advocate. I give my 2 year old more than one chance to obey me. I let her get away with more if she is tired or hungry or emotional. Overall, I liked the message of parenting the heart, but found implementing it with very young children a challenge.
3. Legend by Marie Lu
I had high hopes for this dystopian young adult novel. I'm still not sure why I didn't enjoy it more. I think the characters didn't make an impression and that is huge for me. If I don't love (or hate) the characters, then the book is always a disappointment. Many people love this novel, though, and it's the first in a trilogy so check it out if you like young adult. I won't be reading anymore of this series.
4. My Name Is Not Easy by Debby Dahl Edwardson
This book I loved. I can't adequately describe it myself, so here is an excerpt from The Book Smugglers review on Goodreads:
...carefully crafted novel that follows the story of a group of Iñupiaq, Native American and white children who are sent to a Catholic boarding school in Alaska in the 60s. Although some of the characters and events are inspired by the author’s husband’s childhood experiences, My Name is Not Easy is mostly a fictional account of a complex period in Alaska’s history. In the early 60s, Alaskan parents had to send their kids away to boarding schools where the children were introduced to and forced to practice new ways of life – eating completely different food than they are used to, learning a new belief system, forbidden to use their own language not to mention being torn apart from their family and everything they had ever known.
It is awesome. Go read it. Plus, it's short. Added bonus for you non-readers out there.
5. Clockwork Princess by Cassandra Clare.
I will always indulge in Cassie Clare's novels. They are fun to read and there is always wonderful tension between the male and female protagonists. I actually shed a few tears while reading this one. I totally blame being postpartum for that silliness.
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