So, I started a new bible study about the Holy Spirit. I needed to have something to do every day! I'm not so good at "self-study" :)
Anyway, the author told me to "talk with God today about your life. Ask Him to give you real and abundant life". Okay, I can talk to God about that.
But, I have no idea what "abundant life" looks like in Oklahoma with a newborn, a dog, a cat, & a soldier. What should I be striving for & if I don't know what to be striving for, how will I get there? Does abundant life look like serving others or seriously studying God's word? Or maybe it looks like being a supportive wife? Or Mommy-extradinaire? How do I KNOW what abundant life for me looks like?
I tell God all the time that I want to live out my personal motto since becoming a mommy: "Don't just survive, but thrive". But again, I don't know what thriving looks like. Maybe it's not crying every day or laughing more or being organized & keeping my house clean? Maybe it's having personal hobbies or making friends?
So, I know there isn't a magical answer, but does anyone have insight on how to know when you have "arrived" at this elusive concept of an abundant life? Or how to go about getting there?
Friday, June 04, 2010
Friday, May 28, 2010
Ch-Ch-Changes
Well, I got a baby now :)
She's pretty & she likes to cry a lot. Well, maybe "like" isn't the correct word, but she does cry a lot. She actually is NOT crying right now so I have a moment (but maybe just one) to play catch up.
We moved-that was hard. We had no furniture for about a week. Not fun when you are breast feeding 8 times a day. We still have about 20 boxes in the garage that remain unopened. But we have the necesities so why bother since we will be moving again in 6 months? Love that army.
Hubby is leaving for 6 days on the field. I get to be alone with no one for company (& no one to help) except a dog, a cat, & a newborn with colic. Sounds like fun, huh? But enough complaining!
I suppose God wants me to be alone. Depend on Him, turn to Him...more like cling to Him with every breath I take! In my head, I know it's a good place to be...utter dependance on God. It's hard though. It seems like this baby is attached to my hip & I guess that's how God wants me to be with Him. The more He takes away, the more I need Him.
On a more positive note, I LOVE not being pregnant anymore!! It's the best ever! My stomach is flat, my pains are gone, I get to button my pants, & NO heartburn!
We have also been blesssed with an amazing house & an amazing back deck & an amazing child. I'm rich in love :)
She's pretty & she likes to cry a lot. Well, maybe "like" isn't the correct word, but she does cry a lot. She actually is NOT crying right now so I have a moment (but maybe just one) to play catch up.
We moved-that was hard. We had no furniture for about a week. Not fun when you are breast feeding 8 times a day. We still have about 20 boxes in the garage that remain unopened. But we have the necesities so why bother since we will be moving again in 6 months? Love that army.
Hubby is leaving for 6 days on the field. I get to be alone with no one for company (& no one to help) except a dog, a cat, & a newborn with colic. Sounds like fun, huh? But enough complaining!
I suppose God wants me to be alone. Depend on Him, turn to Him...more like cling to Him with every breath I take! In my head, I know it's a good place to be...utter dependance on God. It's hard though. It seems like this baby is attached to my hip & I guess that's how God wants me to be with Him. The more He takes away, the more I need Him.
On a more positive note, I LOVE not being pregnant anymore!! It's the best ever! My stomach is flat, my pains are gone, I get to button my pants, & NO heartburn!
We have also been blesssed with an amazing house & an amazing back deck & an amazing child. I'm rich in love :)
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Productive Me
You may think that the title of this post is contradictory in nature if you know who the "me" is (it is me, after all). However, Hubby has been gone for 5 days & as I have done NO-THING I want to & I will begin being productive.
(on a side note, Regis is on with his wife today because Kelly is gone & it is hilarious! His wife should seriously be on everyday. He is SO MUCH funnier with his wife than with Kelly. They bicker & tease & are totally cracking me up!)
Ok, commercial break. Back to productivity. Here are a few of the things I will get done before I go into labor :)
1.) I will wash all of Baby Girl's clothes. I am tempted just to wash the little ones, but with all this time on my hands, I think I might as well wash all of them. Besides, once I open the Dreft, the movers won't move it, so I better use as much of it as I can. I might wash my own clothes in it-is that bad?
2.) I will do a Bible Study scrapbook. I have been talking about this since LAST summer & now I have 2 weeks to do it before it becomes a lost cause. But if I work on it everyday, I can get it done.
(oh crap, now Jeff Goldblum is one. I love that guy. Back to you in a minute)
3.) OK, I will also write in Baby Girl's baby book. There are lots of pages to fill out before she arrives & if I don't at least get a head start on it...yep, you guessed it...another lost cause.
OK, for me that is enough. I am not one of those people that make more goals than I can keep because it motivates me. Hubby is like that. I do better with smaller, more attainable goals so that I don't get overwhelmed & give up.
SO, here's to hoping!
Also, today I have already done the dishes (because I hadn't done ANY since hubby left. Surprise, surprise) & I am getting ready to vacuum!
(on a side note, Regis is on with his wife today because Kelly is gone & it is hilarious! His wife should seriously be on everyday. He is SO MUCH funnier with his wife than with Kelly. They bicker & tease & are totally cracking me up!)
Ok, commercial break. Back to productivity. Here are a few of the things I will get done before I go into labor :)
1.) I will wash all of Baby Girl's clothes. I am tempted just to wash the little ones, but with all this time on my hands, I think I might as well wash all of them. Besides, once I open the Dreft, the movers won't move it, so I better use as much of it as I can. I might wash my own clothes in it-is that bad?
2.) I will do a Bible Study scrapbook. I have been talking about this since LAST summer & now I have 2 weeks to do it before it becomes a lost cause. But if I work on it everyday, I can get it done.
(oh crap, now Jeff Goldblum is one. I love that guy. Back to you in a minute)
3.) OK, I will also write in Baby Girl's baby book. There are lots of pages to fill out before she arrives & if I don't at least get a head start on it...yep, you guessed it...another lost cause.
OK, for me that is enough. I am not one of those people that make more goals than I can keep because it motivates me. Hubby is like that. I do better with smaller, more attainable goals so that I don't get overwhelmed & give up.
SO, here's to hoping!
Also, today I have already done the dishes (because I hadn't done ANY since hubby left. Surprise, surprise) & I am getting ready to vacuum!
Monday, March 29, 2010
Smile!
I am doing pretty good today. I suppose that my emotional state will ebb & flow as long as I have all these pregnancy hormones swishing around inside of me!
I got through the first weekend without hubby without too much damage to my heart.
AND, hubby found a place for us to live! It is going to stretch our budget a bit, but not throw us into debt or anything...we are just going to get creative :) It's a 3-BR house with a back yard in a good neighborhood, close to Walmart, and close to Mexican food. Give me Walmart, give me Mexican & I'm pretty happy. I can't wait to see it in person! Hubby has sent me pictures & I think it looks perfect for us & the babies!
AND, I have plans every single weekend till Baby Girl comes! Yay!
I hope hubby is doing ok without us. At least by tomorrow, he will be out of the hotel. Hopefully, time will go by fast for both of us. I miss him so much! I can picture him in the doorway or sitting on the couch with me. Today I even pictured him at the Dr. with me! I hope I don't sound too crazy...:)
So, SMILE because life is ok, but God is great!
I got through the first weekend without hubby without too much damage to my heart.
AND, hubby found a place for us to live! It is going to stretch our budget a bit, but not throw us into debt or anything...we are just going to get creative :) It's a 3-BR house with a back yard in a good neighborhood, close to Walmart, and close to Mexican food. Give me Walmart, give me Mexican & I'm pretty happy. I can't wait to see it in person! Hubby has sent me pictures & I think it looks perfect for us & the babies!
AND, I have plans every single weekend till Baby Girl comes! Yay!
I hope hubby is doing ok without us. At least by tomorrow, he will be out of the hotel. Hopefully, time will go by fast for both of us. I miss him so much! I can picture him in the doorway or sitting on the couch with me. Today I even pictured him at the Dr. with me! I hope I don't sound too crazy...:)
So, SMILE because life is ok, but God is great!
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Gone
Gone. My love is gone. Truth be told yesterday was way worse than today. I did really good yesterday at lunch & loading up the car. Then before dinner, I went to snuggle with my baby cat who also went with my love & I told him (the cat) that it wasn't forever & I. Lost. It. The tears absolutely would not stop for a long time. Hubby went outside to pick up doggie dung & I sat on the porch and just cried and cried and cried. Then when I sort of stopped, we went to eat at the Herd Cafe-one last Marshall meal :) I wasn't bawling or anything, just consistent leakage. Poor hubby-I don't know how he puts up with me. When your pregnant, everything just seems so much harder than normal. Finally, when we laid down to go to bed, I stopped. I gave him a Benadryl so he would get some sleep before his 16-hour drive today.
I woke up at 3:30 to give our kitty a sedative...which bless his heart made him woozy snoozy. He couldn't walk in a straight line! If I didn't feel so bad for him, I would have taken pictures. But I just couldn't make fun of the poor guy. His second set of eyelids came up & he really looked drunk or something. I still feel bad for him! He's my baby! But, truth be told, we did have a good laugh ;-)
Then we woke up for real around 4am & did last minute stuff (snuggle with our babies one last time...me with Phoenix, Hubby with Bella) & then he left a bit before 5. I, of course, called him at 5:15 to check on him & Phoenix & then I called him again when I went back to sleep around 6ish, & again at 8:30 when I woke up & again at 10 when I woke up again. And I've talked to him pretty consistently since then. At least every hour or so. So, the hardest part is over for me. Now, hubby's hard part is going to be the drive (as I type this 8 hours later he is only halfway there!) & finding us an apartment. And, the hardest is yet to come after the birth of our daughter when we must separate once again. But, for today, I am ok :) And so is hubby :)
On another note, my sis is coming to visit me today with a friend & 2 dogs! They drove all the way from Colorado to visit East Coast family and such. I am glad Bella will have some friends tonight because she is acting so weird. She keeps whining. Hubby normally works all day so either she just knows something is wrong or she misses the cat...?? Poor girl-I will never provide the fun & excitement that hubby does. He gets on the floor with her & rolls around & plays tug-of-war with her. I try, but I am kind of allergic to her & she is way stronger than me, so tug-of-war is no fun. She's a sweet dog. I tried to take her on a walk, but it was sprinkling so we pretty much just walked to the end of the block and back. Another thing hubby would do is take her for a walk in the rain. I wish she wasn't stuck with me, but I would be way more lonely without her.
I am still trying to compile my Top 10 list for Huntington, so suggestions are still welcome :)
I woke up at 3:30 to give our kitty a sedative...which bless his heart made him woozy snoozy. He couldn't walk in a straight line! If I didn't feel so bad for him, I would have taken pictures. But I just couldn't make fun of the poor guy. His second set of eyelids came up & he really looked drunk or something. I still feel bad for him! He's my baby! But, truth be told, we did have a good laugh ;-)
Then we woke up for real around 4am & did last minute stuff (snuggle with our babies one last time...me with Phoenix, Hubby with Bella) & then he left a bit before 5. I, of course, called him at 5:15 to check on him & Phoenix & then I called him again when I went back to sleep around 6ish, & again at 8:30 when I woke up & again at 10 when I woke up again. And I've talked to him pretty consistently since then. At least every hour or so. So, the hardest part is over for me. Now, hubby's hard part is going to be the drive (as I type this 8 hours later he is only halfway there!) & finding us an apartment. And, the hardest is yet to come after the birth of our daughter when we must separate once again. But, for today, I am ok :) And so is hubby :)
On another note, my sis is coming to visit me today with a friend & 2 dogs! They drove all the way from Colorado to visit East Coast family and such. I am glad Bella will have some friends tonight because she is acting so weird. She keeps whining. Hubby normally works all day so either she just knows something is wrong or she misses the cat...?? Poor girl-I will never provide the fun & excitement that hubby does. He gets on the floor with her & rolls around & plays tug-of-war with her. I try, but I am kind of allergic to her & she is way stronger than me, so tug-of-war is no fun. She's a sweet dog. I tried to take her on a walk, but it was sprinkling so we pretty much just walked to the end of the block and back. Another thing hubby would do is take her for a walk in the rain. I wish she wasn't stuck with me, but I would be way more lonely without her.
I am still trying to compile my Top 10 list for Huntington, so suggestions are still welcome :)
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